Tanya

So Many Emotions

2011-04-12T16:23:00.000-07:00

As I started my day today I thought of how much I want to become a nurse. I want to help people, care for people, and possibly be the reason that another person wants to become a nurse. I have an overwhelming desire to fulfill this goal in my life. I have worked so very hard to get to this point in my life. Including all the hard times in high school. The hardships of going to college full time and at the same time working full time. After my first year of college then moving to a completely different state 5 hours away from my family and all the friends I had ever known. Then getting married and applying to nursing school and finishing the nursing program with some really amazing people! During my last semester of school I went through a divorce and having to completely reconfigure my life (NOT an easy time!). Then failing boards (yes, i'm admitting it) to then moving to another completely different state which is now 10 hours away from my family & friends in Idaho and Nevada...now getting to this point where I am settled more, I am starting a new life, and am getting things figured out. It's been a long year and an exciting year too. A lot of different emotions i've gone through the past year or so. I feel like I am a very strong person, but can be knocked down very easily. With that said I am feeling knocked down. I am ready to start my career and I can't until I pass this stinkin state boards. I can come up with all kinds of excuses, but it all comes down to the fact that I am a terrible test taker! I woke up this morning feeling beaten, defeated, and sad all because of a test. Someone said to me "well what is plan B?" WHAT I am supposed to have a plan B? As In find something else I have an overwhelming desire and feel like it's my calling in life? The only thing that would compare to those feelings would be becoming a mom! Therefore I am telling myself I CAN do this. I am on the verge of tears and breaking down at any moment because of the intense stress. However the very worst that can happen is I retest in 45 days!

Update...

2011-02-27T16:45:00.001-08:00

I have been slacking a lot on updating my blog...I'm doing well and slowly but surely i'm getting settled in and used to being so far away from family. It's tough and I don't think anyone ever gets over being homesick. I think one just gets homesick a little less often. I do miss my family dearly. Wish I could take a trip home more often :( . Maybe my next couple adventures I have going on will be helpful for me :). This past year hasn't been anything of what I expected or how I thought I would spend my last year. I have no regrets with my decisions I've made and I am so very proud of myself for being strong and doing what was right for me. I was ready to be happy and make myself happy. I did just that!

Why?

2010-12-09T18:42:00.000-08:00

Well, today is another day down. I'm just gonna put it out there...I'm really struggling with life right now. Yeah, my life isn't half as bad as a lot of people's this I know. However, I feel like I need some inspiration from others. I need to hear how others get through the rough patches in their lives. How does everyone just keep going and continue with everything spite their short comings, dissappointments, and problems? I think I am really hard on myself, but I feel like I have to be and need to be in order to be anything in this crazy busy world. I know I have a lot to be thankful for. At the same time I get frustrated at everything I have had to overcome. Yet again I know I wouldn't be half as strong as I am if I hadn't gone through the many crazy trials in life that I have so far. What are some of your opinions, comments, and words of encouragment? Do any of you ever feel this way? Do you ever sit and wonder-Why? I would love to hear from everyone. Thank you so much. Thank you for reading this sort of a whinny post...really I thank you! :)

Incredible, breath-taking, sweet, and caring!

2010-11-03T11:14:00.000-07:00

Incredible, breath-taking, sweet, and caring are just a few of the words that come to mind when I read and think of this amazing blog I discovered last weekend. I can't stop reading it and checking everyday to see what new posts this amazing couple and family have written. The blog I discovered is Patrick and Ashley Sullenger. You can visit there blog at; patrickandashley.blogspot.com

This young couple are so filled with the spirit and have already taught me and reminded me what I need to be doing in life and with my life. Their blog is so filled with the spirit, and in each post it's like reading a little part of their testimonies. It's truly inspiring.

When I discovered their blog I knew that the girl looked familiar to me. However I couldn't figure it out. This morning it hit me I know her! I went to Madison schools in Rexburg when I was younger. She is a year younger than me. It's sort of crazy because I remember her of all the other people I went to school with some I don't remember who were my own age. I can remember thinking about her randomly when I moved back to Snake River ( i'm not like a crazy stalker :) ) Ashley and her husband Patrick are incredible!

I felt that I need to put this post on my blog and share there blog with everyone I could. Also, there is a post on their blog called "Pay it Forward" please read this and if you can help in any way that you can. Like Ashley said so many times in different posts we should serve others, it saves our lives. I am going to try to do as much I can to help this project. It's truly for a good cause.

Thank you everyone for reading this and visiting their blog. Thank you for your help to their project. What a great feeling it is to know you have helped in even the smallest way(s).

Little things that matter

2010-09-15T12:32:00.000-07:00

It's the little things in life that we forget matter the most. As a kid being able to ride on the 4wheeler trailer with all my cousins, wearing my favorite mickey mouse shoes, or riding with grandpa in the tractor mattered the most. As we grow up we forget about the little things that matter to use and to others. We get caught up in our big fancy dreams, money, houses,..LIFE really. I thought about these things when my sister-n-law sent me this picture of my dad and nephew-Jett. They are both so happy here just playing in the life size doll house that is my niece-Avery's. Jett is so happy just being with grandpa and my dad had a wonderful time playing with both Jett and Avery during his visit. I try to not forget the little things that matter most, and I LOVE my family!

I did it...I graduated Nursing school!!!

2010-05-24T18:19:00.000-07:00

As of May 20th I did it! I am officially a graduate nurse now. I completed the crazy nursing program and made it through my two years. Waking up the morning of my pinning ceremony I had a perma grin. I was a little emotional all day. To happy to let anything make me upset or sad. In all reality it all felt a little surreal, and still does actually. I am petrified to be a big girl in this big crazy world. With the incredible confidence of my wonderful precepter-Tammy, I believe in myself a little bit more. I will never be able to thank her enough for the amazing things she has done for me and the confidence she helped me build in myself. Truly one of the most amazing women! I feel so blessed to have had my family come from Idaho and Salt Lake to share my huge accomplishment of graduating with me. I loved spending time with them and was sad to have them leave Saturday. My two brothers Jesse and Cory pinned me at my ceremony and Jett my youngest nephew (jesse's little boy) had to come on stage too. Thank you to everyone who helped me get this far in my schooling and in life!

Baby Shower 1

2009-11-26T12:50:00.001-08:00

Make a Smilebox slideshow

This must be the season to have babies! In my nursing class there has been 6 pregnancies and so far 4 healthy, happy, beautiful babies born! Myself, a friend-Tawnya, and another friend-Jessica all in the nursing program have put together 4 successful baby showers. They were all surprises and the expecting parents were forever grateful. It is so much fun to do this for the new moms and to see their expressions, tears, and surprise on their face when they walk into the room and see it says "it's a BOY!" or "it's a GIRL!" I decided to make my last gift which was a rag quilt for cami who was expecting a baby boy. I did it in one night, and i thought it turned out really good. I actually like doing them because one they are so easy to make, two because it's about the same price as a store bought gift, and three because it's handmade! I also really like making the wrapping of gifts special and unique as well.